Menopause and Sex

Menopause and sex: for many women, these two aspects of life seem incompatible, but is this really the case? Does menopause bring an end to sex as you’ve known it?

Menopause can cause complex emotions and changes in physical sensations for which many women aren’t fully prepared. As the body transitions, challenges like vaginal dryness, low arousal, decreased libido, and emotional shifts can make intimacy feel different and even uncomfortable. 

Understanding these changes and finding ways to address them can allow women to continue enjoying fulfilling, healthy sexual relationships. By embracing this new phase with knowledge and confidence, women can discover new pathways to intimacy and rediscover sexual pleasure during menopause.

How Menopause Can Impact Your Sex Life

Menopause is a significant life transition that brings many changes, some of which can impact your sex life. Lower hormone levels, fluctuating emotions, and physical changes in the body can create new challenges in the bedroom. 

Acknowledging and learning about these changes can help you find ways to adapt, adjust, and maintain intimacy during and after menopause.

Decreased Sex Drive

As menopause sets in, many women experience a noticeable drop in sex drive, largely due to the decline in estrogen and testosterone levels. These hormones influence desire and energy levels, and their reduction can lead to less spontaneous arousal or interest in sex. 

Additionally, symptoms like vaginal dryness and mood shifts can create discomfort and make sex less appealing. 

A lower libido can impact both physical intimacy and emotional connection with your partner, but open communication and trying new forms of intimacy can help.

Arousal Difficulties

Hormone fluctuations can make it harder to feel physically aroused. Estrogen, which is responsible for blood flow to the genital area, and testosterone decrease, which can reduce sensitivity and slow the body’s natural responses to arousal cues. 

This means it may take longer to feel ready for sex or that the sensations may not be as strong as before. Engaging in longer foreplay, using arousal-enhancing products, and trying new intimate activities can help bring excitement back to the bedroom.

Certain medications, such as SSRIs, can have a negative impact on desire and arousal. Ask your doctor to review your current medications to see if any might be compounding arousal issues.

Vaginal Dryness

Vaginal dryness, caused by lower estrogen levels, is a common symptom of menopause. Estrogen helps maintain natural moisture in the vaginal tissue; without it, the vagina can feel dry, sensitive, or irritated, making sex uncomfortable or even painful. 

Vaginal dryness can impact sexual enjoyment and cause discomfort, but products such as personal lubricants and vaginal moisturizers, as well as estrogen-based treatments, can provide relief.

Thinner Vaginal Tissue

Estrogen, in addition to maintaining vaginal moisture, keeps vaginal tissues strong and elastic. When estrogen levels drop, these tissues can become thinner and more fragile, a condition known as vaginal atrophy. 

Thinner tissue may tear more easily and lead to pain or discomfort during intercourse. This can create anxiety about sex and discourage sexual activity. Using estrogen-based creams or engaging in gentle sexual activities can help keep the tissue healthier and reduce discomfort.

Changes to the Vulva

Menopause-related hormone changes, particularly the decline in estrogen and testosterone, can affect the size and sensitivity of the labia and clitoris. The vaginal opening (vestibule) may also narrow or become less elastic, leading to discomfort during sex. 

Additionally, anxiety caused by the thought of painful or uncomfortable sex can cause involuntary pelvic floor clenching, resulting in a high-tone pelvis, which exacerbates discomfort. 

Your doctor may recommend pelvic floor physical therapy, which can help relax these muscles, improve blood flow, and restore comfort and confidence during intimacy.

Trouble Reaching Orgasm

Menopause can make it more challenging to reach orgasm. Lower levels of estrogen and testosterone reduce blood flow and sensitivity in the genitals, while psychological factors such as stress can add to the difficulty. 

Women may feel they need more time or stimulation to reach climax, but experimenting with new techniques, dedicating more time to foreplay, or using intimacy aids can help increase pleasure and improve the likelihood of orgasm.

Emotional Changes

Hormonal changes during menopause don’t just affect the body; they impact mood and emotional health as well. Many women experience increased irritability, sadness, or anxiety, which can impact interest in sex and intimacy. 

The emotional shifts may lead to misunderstandings or tension in relationships. Talking openly with your partner, practicing self-care, and seeking emotional support can help manage these feelings.

Sleep Disturbances

Menopause can bring sleep disruptions, including night sweats, insomnia, and general restlessness. Lack of sleep can leave women feeling fatigued and less interested in sexual activities. 

Poor sleep also affects mood and energy, making it difficult to feel motivated and engaged during sex. Developing a good sleep routine, managing stress, and addressing night sweats can help support restful sleep, which, in turn, improves overall mood and sexual interest.

If menopause-related sleep issues are significantly impacting your life, speak with your healthcare practitioner about the possibility of adding hormone therapy to your treatment plan.

Stress and Anxiety

Hormonal fluctuations can heighten stress and anxiety, both of which can dampen libido significantly. Additionally, worries about the physical changes of menopause, including weight gain, may lead to self-consciousness. 

Anxiety and stress make it hard to relax and enjoy intimate moments, creating a cycle that can impact relationships. Relaxation techniques, open communication, and counseling (when needed) can help manage stress and support a more satisfying sex life.

How To Address Menopausal Vaginal Dryness

Vaginal dryness is a very common issue in menopausal and postmenopausal women due to the drop in estrogen levels, which reduces natural lubrication. To address this, many women find relief using over-the-counter vaginal lubricants and moisturizers. 

Water-based lubricants are popular for immediate comfort during intercourse, while vaginal moisturizers are used regularly to maintain long-term hydration. Silicone-based lubricants provide longer-lasting slickness.

In addition to these products, some women may benefit from vaginal dehydroepiandrosterone (DHEA) or estrogen creams, tablets, suppositories, or vaginal rings that can be applied directly to the vaginal area, offering targeted relief by restoring some of the lost moisture and elasticity in the tissues. 

Nonhormonal treatments, such as hyaluronic acid-based vaginal gels, can also help by mimicking natural moisture. 

There are many over-the-counter options available, but it’s best to consult with your doctor to find the safest, most effective way to ease dryness and enhance comfort during sex.

How Vella Can Help With Arousal, Lubrication, and Orgasm

At Vella, helping women enjoy improved arousal, better lubrication, and easier orgasms is our specialty. 

Our team of scientific researchers and highly acclaimed doctors worked for over 7 years to create Women’s Pleasure Serum—an innovative arousal and orgasm cream made with a proprietary liposomal formulation and CBD.

For women experiencing menopausal-related changes, this orgasm cream can be a game-changer, heightening arousal, enhancing natural lubrication, and relaxing smooth muscle tissue while increasing blood flow to make reaching intense orgasms easier.

For those simply needing help with lubrication, we offer two incredible lubes: 

• Our Intimate Elixir was developed especially for women experiencing low estrogen levels. This lightweight water-based lube provides instant natural-feeling slickness and long-lasting, soothing moisturization.
• Our Super Slip & Slide is a nongreasy silicone-based lube containing nourishing ingredients such as squalane and sea buckthorn oil to improve skin elasticity, suppleness, and hydration while providing amazing slickness that lasts as long as you do.

Increasing Libido After Menopause

Lifestyle changes such as regular exercise, a nutritious diet, and stress management can support hormonal balance and boost energy levels, all of which contribute to a healthy sex drive. 

Incorporating more bonding activities with your partner and exploring new forms of intimacy can also reignite desire.

Working with your doctor to address other symptoms associated with menopause can be beneficial as well. Finding relief from dryness and other discomforts you’ve learned to associate with sex after menopause can make sex seem more appealing again.

Additionally, some women benefit from low-dose hormone replacement therapy (HRT) or herbal supplements designed to promote libido but check with your doctor to determine safe and effective options tailored to your individual needs. 

Ways To Improve Sex After Menopause

Menopause can introduce changes that impact intimacy, but it’s also a chance to reconnect with your body and explore new ways of enjoying a fulfilling sex life. Adapting to these changes with a proactive mindset can help make intimacy feel more rewarding, satisfying, and pleasurable. 

• Communication: Open, honest communication with your partner about what feels good, what’s changed, and any discomfort you may have can strengthen your bond and create a more relaxed environment.
• Foreplay: Spending more time on foreplay can help increase arousal and lubrication. Experiment with different forms of foreplay, and take time to explore each other’s desires.
• Lubricants and Moisturizers: Vaginal dryness is common during and after menopause, but high-quality lubricants and moisturizers can increase comfort and pleasure during intercourse.
• Physical Activity: Exercise improves blood flow, boosts mood, and increases energy, all of which are essential for a healthy libido.
• Mindfulness and Relaxation: Practicing mindfulness, meditation, or relaxation exercises can help ease stress and make it easier to stay present and relaxed during intimacy.
• New Experiences: Trying new positions, settings, or activities can add excitement to your routine and keep sex fresh and engaging.
• Professional Support: Speaking with your doctor or a licensed sex therapist can help you explore safe options for enhancing libido and dealing with any physical or emotional challenges.

Drug Therapy Options

Various drug therapies can help alleviate menopause-related sexual health challenges. For instance, vaginal estrogen therapy, available in low doses, addresses vaginal dryness and pain by targeting the local tissue. 

Systemic estrogen therapy is an option that treats the whole body. In addition to preventing bone loss, it can provide relief from vaginal dryness and pain, as well as hot flashes, night sweats, and other common complaints.

Intravaginal dehydroepiandrosterone (DHEA) and ospemifene, a nonhormonal oral medication, are also effective options for managing painful intercourse, and testosterone therapy may improve libido. 

Discuss these options with your doctor to determine the best approach for your needs.

Talking With Your Partner About Menopause and Sex

Discussing menopause and its impact on your sex life can be challenging and even embarrassing for some, but open communication is essential. 

Begin by honestly sharing your experiences and feelings, focusing on how menopause has changed your body and emotional needs. This helps your partner understand the reasons behind any physical or emotional shifts in intimacy.

Encourage your partner to ask questions and express their thoughts and feelings regarding the changes menopause has brought. 

Men often experience age-related sexual changes as well, so if you suspect issues such as erectile dysfunction (ED) or Peyronie’s disease are affecting your sex life, gently broach the subject, and ask your partner to share his concerns.

Working together to find solutions—such as exploring new types of intimacy, trying comfort-enhancing products, or seeking professional guidance—can bring you closer and restore satisfying intimacy.

Practicing Safe Sex After Menopause

Even after menopause, safe sex is essential for protecting against sexually transmitted infections (STIs). 

Hormonal changes do not reduce STI risks, so using condoms and dental dams remains important. Additionally, certain menopausal changes, like vaginal dryness, can increase susceptibility to infections by creating small tears during sex. 

Regular STI testing and open communication with partners about sexual health are key practices to maintain safety and peace of mind.

Closing Thoughts

While menopause may alter certain aspects of intimacy, it’s also an opportunity to embrace change and explore new dimensions of pleasure. 

Whether through lifestyle changes, open communication, or helpful products, there are many ways to address the challenges and maintain a satisfying sex life. 

With a proactive approach, menopause and sex can coexist beautifully, and you can maintain an intimate and fulfilling connection between yourself and your partner.

Shop Vella today to find science-backed sexcare products for women, developed by doctors and clinically proven to enhance arousal and encourage easier and more intense orgasms.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does sex drive come back after menopause?

Sex drive can return after menopause, though it varies by person. Hormonal changes can impact libido, but lifestyle factors, hormone therapy, open communication with partners, and sex therapy can help rekindle desire, creating a fulfilling sex life after menopause.

How to increase a woman’s sex drive during menopause?

Boosting libido during menopause can involve hormone therapy, lifestyle adjustments like regular exercise, and stress management. Using products for arousal and staying connected emotionally with your partner can also enhance desire and sexual satisfaction.

What are the benefits of sex during menopause?

Sex during menopause offers emotional and physical benefits, including stress relief, boosted self-esteem, improved circulation, and hormone release, which can enhance mood. Regular sexual activity may also reduce vaginal dryness and promote overall vaginal health.

Does a woman still get wet after menopause?

Yes, many women do still “get wet” when aroused following menopause, but many find that natural lubrication decreases following menopause due to lower estrogen levels. Many women find relief from dryness with vaginal moisturizers, lubricants, and topical treatments.