Do you remember that glorious sex scene in Meet Joe Black, (aka Brad Pitt in his thirties, need we say more)? In this scene, the leading lady, Claire Forlani, guides Pitt's character through what is essentially his first sexual experience. It's magical, sweet, and divinely sensual. Maybe this scene was so hot because it showed the innocence and splendor of sex in its newest and purest form. It captured the moment when everything is special and exciting—and left us all wanting to experience that same chemistry with a person.
Here's the thing, you can. It doesn't have to be your first time in order to feel like it's the first time. The gap between dull and delicious can be crossed. Your sexual repertoire just might need a good spring cleaning.
When spring rolls around, do you go into a hyper-cleaning mode, purging closets, obliterating dust, and polishing floors? This year, direct that ultra-cleaning power into the important area of refreshing your sex life.
How To Improve Your Sex Life
It's time to ditch the old routines, dust off the toys, spruce up the bedsheets, and spring into a better sex life with these 7 tips…
"It doesn't have to be your first time in order to feel like it's the first time. The gap between dull and delicious can be crossed."
1. Refresh Your Body
According to Harvard Health, "Your sexual well-being goes hand in hand with your overall mental, physical, and emotional health. Therefore, the same healthy habits you rely on to keep your body in shape can also shape up your sex life." A healthy diet, exercise, moderating alcohol intake, managing stress, and getting good sleep all affect your sexual prowess. For example, physical arousal is widely dependent on good blood flow, which is why exercise is a must. Physical activity strengthens your heart and blood vessels. If you want to go for an O, you need good blood flow.
"Your sexual well-being goes hand in hand with your overall mental, physical, and emotional health. Therefore, the same healthy habits you rely on to keep your body in shape can also shape up your sex life." ~ Harvard Health
2. Refresh Your Communication
How you talk to each other on a daily basis will affect the bond, trust, and happiness you have with your partner. If you want to be close in the bedroom, you need to be close outside of it too. It comes down to how you talk to one another. Avoid critical, condescending, and negative comments and tones. Life can dish out struggles and hardships, which can cause tension, anger, and frustration, but it's important to not project those emotions onto your partner. If you're struggling to connect on a verbal level, we highly recommend finding a couples therapist who can help you learn to communicate better.
3. Refresh Your Date Nights
Do you go to the same place and do the same thing every date night? It's time to switch it up! Building a strong connection with your partner means you need to spend quality time together. Next date night, try out one of these ideas:
1. Play tourist in your hometown
2. Learn a new skill together
3. Go on a picnic at a park
4. Walk nature trails
5. Take a dance class
6. See a comedy show
7. Fly kites
8. Play trivia at a bar
9. See a drive-in movie
10. Drive go-karts
11. Build a bucket list
4. Refresh Your Foreplay
Great sex starts with a great buildup, and foreplay begins even before your clothes come off. According to Healthline, "Foreplay triggers physiological and physical responses that make the sexual activity enjoyable and even possible. Engaging in foreplay helps build emotional intimacy that can make you and your partner feel more connected in and out of the bedroom." Consider adding these options to your foreplay lineup:
a. Sexting
b. Makeout Like Your Teenagers
c. Dancing
d. Role Playing
e. Using Props
f. Hitting all the Erogenous Zones
5. Refresh Your Intimacy Products
Sex should feel good. If you're struggling with uncomfortable friction, it'll be hard to be in the moment. This is why we recommend the following products to enhance your sex sessions:
a. Women's Pleasure Serum– If you've been reaching for the Big O but landing at oh-well, this product is your new best friend. This serum penetrates deep into the tissues of your inner labia and clitoris to relax the smooth muscle and stimulate intense and satisfying orgasms. Even better, those orgasms can be more frequent too. (Did someone say double or triple? Yes, please.)
b. Women's Intimate Elixir– Raise your hand if you're entering menopause, in menopause, or are in the post stages. This water-based lubricant is for YOU. During these stages, your hormones go through changes that can lead to thinning vaginal tissues and dryness. Factors that can make sex uncomfortable or worse, painful. The key to making sex fun again is found in our Intimate Elixir's main ingredient—hyaluronic acid. This gold-standard ingredient hydrates the vagina at a molecular level helping supplement your natural wetness.
c. Super Slip & Slide— If you simply need a good lubricant for your enjoyment, this is it. The lightweight and silky texture of this lube provides exceptional glide. It doesn't get sticky or cause irritation. Thanks to the ingredient called squalane (a molecule known for its ability to moisturize and prevent water loss) the Slip & Slide not only soothes the skin but also never dries out, giving you uninterrupted hours for any kind of play.
6. Refresh Your Positions
Watching the same movie over and over gets boring. Your sex life is the same way. If you do the same positions repeatedly, it's going to get old. Changing it up adds interest to lovemaking and certain positions will stimulate you in new ways. Spice up your sex life with these positions:
a. April Showers— The receiving partner will rest their forearms on the shower wall, while slightly spreading their legs, keeping their knees bent, and sticking their butt out. The penetrating partner enters from behind. Make sure you're both under the water and if you have a removable shower head, receivers with a vulva can use it to simultaneously stimulate their clitoris.
b. Forming a T— Your partner lies on their side while you lie on your back, perpendicular to each other. With your legs draped over top of them, guide them inside you. This position allows for full-body views and great clit play.
c. Criss Cross— Lay on the bed or a table (basically anything about hip height with your partner). As they stand and enter you, cross your legs and let them rest on your chest. You can play around with how tight you have them crossed to explore the different sensations.
d. The Bridge– This can be done for penetrative or oral sex. The receiving partner will form a glute bridge. (Glute bridge = Lay down on your back with your knees bent and your feet flat on the ground. Your feet should be hip-width apart and your arms laid straight at your sides. Keeping shoulders flush on the ground, squeeze your glutes and raise your hips as high as you can go without arching your back.) While you hold the bridge, your partner will enter. The elevation allows your partner to go deeper and puts your vagina in a different position. If holding the bridge is tiring, you can always prop pillows under your backside to create the perfect angle.
7. Refresh Your Fun
Springing into a better sex life means springing into a new way of sexual thinking. SEX SHOULD BE FUN! It's not a checklist item. It should be something you want to do. When something is fun, we want to do it. Here are some ways to make it fun again…
a. Add Adventure — You're going for the element of naughty and rebellious. Have sex on the living room floor or in a secluded meadow. Or maybe in a pool?
b. Add Romance — Spoil each other with poems, flowers, or favorites. Leave love notes in their lunchbox or pants pockets. Woo each other like you're dating all over again.
c. Add Playfulness — Turn back the dial and be kiddish. Laugh together. Try having fun with feathers or taking a bubble bath. You can even incorporate props like blindfolds or swings.
It's time to have your own, Meet Joe Black moment. Put these spring tips into practice, and watch your sex life blossom. You owe it to your relationship and to yourself.
"SEX SHOULD BE FUN! It's not a checklist item. It should be something you want to do."