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Rethinking Sex: 7 New Years Sex Resolutions

21 December, 2022

Happy New Year! We’ve toasted, kissed, and now it’s time to make our resolutions. Sure you can buy the gym membership, or swear off chocolate, but are you really going to follow through? Why not resolve to do something FUN? This year, let’s make a resolution we’ll keep—reimagining and rethinking sex. Make 2023 your best year yet…in bed. Embrace all of your sexuality with these new ideas for sex.

7 New Years Sex Resolutions
 
1. Create a Sex Diary

This is your personal diary to track your sexual likes, dislikes, new positions, toys, and desires. It’ll help you hone in on what’s working (or not) in order to enhance your sex life.

2. Give Yourself More Time For Pleasure

It’s time to expect more from sex, solo or partnered. Why shouldn’t we expect orgasms and sweet delight? You deserve to reach self-satisfaction during sex. Sometimes, it takes time to discover what you like or what turns you on. According to erotic wholeness coach, Darshana Avila, solo sex actually enhances partnered sex because it helps in “fostering a connection to your eroticism, engaging your senses in really pleasurable ways, communing with your body and heart, making masturbation into a mindful practice rather than a race across a finish line. This way, when you come back into connection with your significant other, you have something to share.” Case in point–you can’t tell your partner what you enjoy unless you find out first. Likewise, sex with a partner shouldn’t feel like a sprint. It should be an unrushed time for communicating, exploring, and ensuring that both people are satisfied.

“Make 2023 your best year yet…in bed.

 
3. Wear More Items You Feel Sexy In

Sexiness starts on the inside in the form of confidence, but what we wear on the outside can boost our confidence. According to research from the University of Hertfordshire, “People tend to dress the way they feel. If you feel sad or unmotivated, you’re more likely to wear unflattering clothing. Fortunately, you can change your mood by changing your clothes. A theory known as “dopamine dressing” suggests that wearing certain kinds of clothes can help you feel happier even on days when you’re not at your best.” With this in mind, if you want to feel sexy, then you need to wear items that are sexy. (Note: sexiness is relative to each person.) This could mean clothes that fit you correctly. This could mean buying those leather pants. It’s clothing that YOU feel sexy in. But sexy clothes aren’t limited to the ones that are seen. What lies beneath is important too, like a matching lace bra and underwear set, or red lingerie. 

4. Start Sexting

If your eyes just bugged out and you’re ready to scroll on, give us a moment to explain. Sexting is merely a form of flirting with your words. Elizabeth Dell, a certified sex educator, says, “Sending (and receiving!) sexy texts is one of the best ways to explore intimacy, pleasure, and sex as a whole. It is great for turning you on, heating up your partner, exploring new ideas, and learning what excites you both.” Sexting gives you the perfect opportunity to explore your playful side and venture thoughts you’ve been too shy to say to your partner’s face!

Some Ideas To Get You Started…

“I wish you were here”

“I bet you look so hot right now”

“Eating my lunch, thinking you’d taste better”

“You want to know what I can’t stop thinking about?”

“Last night was fun”

“Sending (and receiving!) sexy texts is one of the best ways to explore intimacy, pleasure, and sex as a whole” ~Elizabeth Dell (Sex Educator)

5. Stop Faking Orgasms

Up to 80% of women have faked an orgasm! That’s a lot of bedroom performances. But here’s the truth: YOU DESERVE THE REAL THING. Faking it robs you and your partner of having authentic sexual experiences. According to relationship coach, Jordan Gray, “If you’re continuously faking it with someone, you’re essentially saying, ‘I give up. I won’t/don’t know how to express my true needs.’ Either you think you can’t have orgasms with them, or you opt for the route of avoidance and settling for less to appease someone else, rather than communicating openly and calibrating to improve the situation.” Don’t settle this year. Tell your partner(s) what you like, need, and desire.

5. Find Your Fantasies

Venturing into your fantasies or “things you’ve always wanted to try” is a must for sexual self-discovery. Ask yourself what you’ve always wanted to try or where you’ve wanted to try it. By having this inner dialogue, you allow yourself to venture into new territory. You give yourself permission to be adventurous. The next step is to communicate those thoughts with your partner. Check-in with your lover to find out what they want, but perhaps have been too afraid to ask. If this sounds like a hard topic to bridge, here’s the solution. Dr. Diana Wiley, author and sex therapist, says that each partner should write a fantasy list. “From a list of possible sexual activities, each partner selects which ones they like, don’t like, or are neutral about,” said Wiley. “Then compare lists to find new activities that both are willing to explore. This can lead to some fun discoveries.”

 

7. Change Positions After 2-3 Sex Sessions

We can fall into repetitive cycles, like being on sex autopilot. When we’re not being intentional, our sexual encounters can grow stale and boring. If you want to keep your sex life fresh, you need to be exploring new positions. We suggest switching up positions after 2-3 sex sessions. If you’ve done missionary for your last three bedroom exploits, it’s time to try something new. Need some suggestions, we’ve got you covered, check out these– Woman On Top and Holiday Favorites.

2023 is a new year with new possibilities. It’s up to you what you’re going to do with it. Whatever you resolve, we hope it ends with you feeling happy, satisfied, and empowered. 

“We can fall into repetitive cycles, like being on sex autopilot. When we’re not being intentional, our sexual encounters can grow stale and boring.”

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